Wednesday, December 23, 2009

A Gut Honest Look At Love

At our last Tender Hearts meeting my friend, Caralee, shared a wonderful devotional with us.  Sometimes it just takes someone else reading something to you - for you to really get it (at least that's the case with me).

She read "A Gut Honest Look at Love" - (proverbs31devotions). 

I don't want to repeat a habit that I've had from the past where I expect unrealistic things from those I love. I used to hold out the little cup of my heart to my husband, "Will you fill my empty spaces? Will you do that one really romantic thing that makes me feel like I'm the most terrific and special woman in the world?"


Then I would hold it out to my children, "Will you fill up my empty spaces? Will you do something that makes me look really good as a mom so I'll feel a little more validated?"


Then I would hold it out to my friends, "Will you fill up my empty spaces? Will you provide something today that makes me feel more included and significant?"

Maybe Christmas is an odd time to consider such things.


Or, maybe this season celebrating Jesus is the perfect time to hit the reset button on my sometimes frail heart. Love is a tricky thing. Our hearts were created to crave it. But misplaced expectations from love can wreak havoc in a person's heart.



God proclaims in 1 Corinthians 13:8 that love never fails. And in the quietness of my heart that verse makes me squirm a bit. I see love failing all the time. Or do I?



If my only view of love is what it will give me, love from others will fail me every time. It's not that love fails. It's that other people were never meant to be my God. Even a great husband, wonderful children and a thriving ministry can never truly fill me up, right all my wrongs, and soothe those deep insecurities. Not at Christmas. Not at any other time of the year.


No, I can't read 1 Corinthians chapter 13 with eyes hungry to see what love should give me and then demand it from those around me. I should read those steadfast Scriptures with the realization that this is the kind of love God gives to me. And this is the kind of love I can choose to give to other people.

I can choose that my love will be patient. My love will be kind. My love won't keep a record of wrongs. (Ouch - that's a hard one, right?)

I can choose that my love will protect and persevere.

And I can choose to lay the cup of my heart at Jesus' feet and stop twirling, twirling, twirling...hoping- demanding- that those around me do things for me they were never meant to do.

Interestingly enough, when I read 1 Corinthians 13 again this morning I found an odd yet perfect verse toward the end of this chapter. "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me" (verse 11).

Yes indeed. How funny I never connected that verse about putting away childish things with 1 Corinthians 13 - known as the chapter of love. Oh how we have the propensity to grow in other areas while keeping such a childish, selfish view of love.


Love isn't what I have the opportunity to get from this world. Love is what I have the opportunity to give. And I guess there's no more appropriate time to remember this than Christmas.


This really hit home with me as it has never done before.  It's so true.  I have lived much of my life much like she described -- holding out my cup for others to fill it.  When all along NO ONE would ever be able to fill it completely - except Jesus.  I love her line:  It's that other people were never meant to be my God.  Wow, when you really sit down and honestly think about it --- how many times have you made other PEOPLE your God?  I am quite ashamed when I think about it.  In my younger days, it was boyfriends (who at the time I thought were the be all to end all of my life), it was my social circle of friends (who I felt like I had to impress at all times), it turned in to my daughter (who I adored and put at the top of my list), then along came my wonderful husband, Mitchell.  When we first started dating and even during the first years of our marriage - I was all consumed by Mitchell.  If we had an argument, I couldn't concentrate on anything else during the day.  I expected him to fill my cup to overflowing!  He told me -- you should love Jesus first, then me.  I will never be able to fulfill all of your expectations and needs.  He was correct.  I had to realize that God is my God.  No one else.  Not that I do not adore my children, intensly love my husband, and enjoy the warmth of my friendships -- but only one person can come first.  Once that choice is made ... your life is shaped.  At least mine is ... it is completely different now that I have TRULY put God above all people and things.  Believe me, I know how life is when other people and things are put first ... and this new way is SO much better!

Reading this devotional has made me think more about love than I have in a long time.  How true it is that so often we keep a childish view of love ... love me! love me! love me!  Hello - God loves me!  What more can I ask?  The God that created the universe, created life ... loves ME! 

And we are called to love others - with patience and kindness.  My goal for 2010 - is to stop, listen and love.  You may never know how your expression of love towards someone else might change their day or their entire life.

Lots of love - to all of my wonderful friends!

Merry Christmas.


A Gut Honest Look At Love

At our last Tender Hearts meeting my friend, Caralee, shared a wonderful devotional with us.  Sometimes it just takes someone else reading something to you - for you to really get it (at least that's the case with me).

She read "A Gut Honest Look at Love" - (proverbs31devotions). 

I don't want to repeat a habit that I've had from the past where I expect unrealistic things from those I love. I used to hold out the little cup of my heart to my husband, "Will you fill my empty spaces? Will you do that one really romantic thing that makes me feel like I'm the most terrific and special woman in the world?"


Then I would hold it out to my children, "Will you fill up my empty spaces? Will you do something that makes me look really good as a mom so I'll feel a little more validated?"


Then I would hold it out to my friends, "Will you fill up my empty spaces? Will you provide something today that makes me feel more included and significant?"

Maybe Christmas is an odd time to consider such things.


Or, maybe this season celebrating Jesus is the perfect time to hit the reset button on my sometimes frail heart. Love is a tricky thing. Our hearts were created to crave it. But misplaced expectations from love can wreak havoc in a person's heart.



God proclaims in 1 Corinthians 13:8 that love never fails. And in the quietness of my heart that verse makes me squirm a bit. I see love failing all the time. Or do I?



If my only view of love is what it will give me, love from others will fail me every time. It's not that love fails. It's that other people were never meant to be my God. Even a great husband, wonderful children and a thriving ministry can never truly fill me up, right all my wrongs, and soothe those deep insecurities. Not at Christmas. Not at any other time of the year.


No, I can't read 1 Corinthians chapter 13 with eyes hungry to see what love should give me and then demand it from those around me. I should read those steadfast Scriptures with the realization that this is the kind of love God gives to me. And this is the kind of love I can choose to give to other people.

I can choose that my love will be patient. My love will be kind. My love won't keep a record of wrongs. (Ouch - that's a hard one, right?)

I can choose that my love will protect and persevere.

And I can choose to lay the cup of my heart at Jesus' feet and stop twirling, twirling, twirling...hoping- demanding- that those around me do things for me they were never meant to do.

Interestingly enough, when I read 1 Corinthians 13 again this morning I found an odd yet perfect verse toward the end of this chapter. "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me" (verse 11).

Yes indeed. How funny I never connected that verse about putting away childish things with 1 Corinthians 13 - known as the chapter of love. Oh how we have the propensity to grow in other areas while keeping such a childish, selfish view of love.


Love isn't what I have the opportunity to get from this world. Love is what I have the opportunity to give. And I guess there's no more appropriate time to remember this than Christmas.


This really hit home with me as it has never done before.  It's so true.  I have lived much of my life much like she described -- holding out my cup for others to fill it.  When all along NO ONE would ever be able to fill it completely - except Jesus.  I love her line:  It's that other people were never meant to be my God.  Wow, when you really sit down and honestly think about it --- how many times have you made other PEOPLE your God?  I am quite ashamed when I think about it.  In my younger days, it was boyfriends (who at the time I thought were the be all to end all of my life), it was my social circle of friends (who I felt like I had to impress at all times), it turned in to my daughter (who I adored and put at the top of my list), then along came my wonderful husband, Mitchell.  When we first started dating and even during the first years of our marriage - I was all consumed by Mitchell.  If we had an argument, I couldn't concentrate on anything else during the day.  I expected him to fill my cup to overflowing!  He told me -- you should love Jesus first, then me.  I will never be able to fulfill all of your expectations and needs.  He was correct.  I had to realize that God is my God.  No one else.  Not that I do not adore my children, intensly love my husband, and enjoy the warmth of my friendships -- but only one person can come first.  Once that choice is made ... your life is shaped.  At least mine is ... it is completely different now that I have TRULY put God above all people and things.  Believe me, I know how life is when other people and things are put first ... and this new way is SO much better!

Reading this devotional has made me think more about love than I have in a long time.  How true it is that so often we keep a childish view of love ... love me! love me! love me!  Hello - God loves me!  What more can I ask?  The God that created the universe, created life ... loves ME! 

And we are called to love others - with patience and kindness.  My goal for 2010 - is to stop, listen and love.  You may never know how your expression of love towards someone else might change their day or their entire life.

Lots of love - to all of my wonderful friends!

Merry Christmas.


Saturday, December 12, 2009

We are in such a hurry, we hate to miss one panel of a revolving door.

I was just reading Charles Swindoll's Insight for Today, QUIETNESS.  When I started this blog - this was my main focus.  To tune out the world around me - if just for the car ride into the office - and just hang out and talk to God.  I am still making an effort to do this (although some mornings Jennifer and I talk on the phone - sometimes all the way to to the office) - b'cs once we hit the door at work, we are usually too busy to chat and catch up.

We took a survey in Bible Study one night.  It had us rate which items we have surrendered to God, and which ones we haven't.  When it came to the line for Work Life ... it really dawned on me, that most often I don't surrender my work.  I consider myself a hard worker.  I believe that I am good at what I do.  However, I need to keep in mind that (1) God has provided me with the gifts needed to do my job; (2) God placed me in the work environment that I should be in; (3) I need to stop leaving God in the car when I walk into my office building.

The last several weeks have been harsh to say the least.  I just feel plain tired.  It's hard for me to tell myself, to slow down.  (Slow Down by Third Day really needs to be my new motto!)  That it's okay to take a break.  I'm a bit of a perfectionist - and quite possibly have a slight case of OCD.  I want to do everything and think I should be able to, and then get upset with myself when I fall short of my own expectations.

As of now I need to (1) FINISH Addison's bathroom -- I'm so close - I just need to walk up the stairs and finish it (2) to put up at least our skinny small trees and hang our stockings, yes, another year is going by without me putting up the big tree, much to my daughter's dismay (3) reorganize my book shelves upstairs (4) transfter our iTunes library off of the slow computer to our external hard drive (5) figure out how to hook up the xbox 360 to the TV in order to stream in netflix (6) finish my Christmas gifts for my friends and Christmas cards (7) clean my house (8) finish paying the bills (9) work some on my silent auction stuff (10) get back to exercising ... the list goes on and on.

I wake up every morning with such good intentions, playing my to do list in my head and assuring myself that today will be the day that I accomplish at least half of my list.  However, by the time I drag my extremely tired and emotionally drained body home from the office, pick up Addison and head home.  I have lost all ambition.  My priorites become - jammies, couch, helping with homework, cooking dinner (on a good night), and working on auction letters.  SIDE NOTE:  Thank God that I am able to get off work at 3pm.

This has been going on for several weeks now and I am completely worn out.  I am now to the point of being tired of being tired!  I hope to not even leave the house tomorrow.  I want to straighten up a bit, put out my small amount Christmas decorations and just relax and work on some of my Christmas gifts.  (tune in later for the next blog - Advent Conspiracy).

We are in such a hurry, we hate to miss one panel of a revolving door.

I was just reading Charles Swindoll's Insight for Today, QUIETNESS.  When I started this blog - this was my main focus.  To tune out the world around me - if just for the car ride into the office - and just hang out and talk to God.  I am still making an effort to do this (although some mornings Jennifer and I talk on the phone - sometimes all the way to to the office) - b'cs once we hit the door at work, we are usually too busy to chat and catch up.

We took a survey in Bible Study one night.  It had us rate which items we have surrendered to God, and which ones we haven't.  When it came to the line for Work Life ... it really dawned on me, that most often I don't surrender my work.  I consider myself a hard worker.  I believe that I am good at what I do.  However, I need to keep in mind that (1) God has provided me with the gifts needed to do my job; (2) God placed me in the work environment that I should be in; (3) I need to stop leaving God in the car when I walk into my office building.

The last several weeks have been harsh to say the least.  I just feel plain tired.  It's hard for me to tell myself, to slow down.  (Slow Down by Third Day really needs to be my new motto!)  That it's okay to take a break.  I'm a bit of a perfectionist - and quite possibly have a slight case of OCD.  I want to do everything and think I should be able to, and then get upset with myself when I fall short of my own expectations.

As of now I need to (1) FINISH Addison's bathroom -- I'm so close - I just need to walk up the stairs and finish it (2) to put up at least our skinny small trees and hang our stockings, yes, another year is going by without me putting up the big tree, much to my daughter's dismay (3) reorganize my book shelves upstairs (4) transfter our iTunes library off of the slow computer to our external hard drive (5) figure out how to hook up the xbox 360 to the TV in order to stream in netflix (6) finish my Christmas gifts for my friends and Christmas cards (7) clean my house (8) finish paying the bills (9) work some on my silent auction stuff (10) get back to exercising ... the list goes on and on.

I wake up every morning with such good intentions, playing my to do list in my head and assuring myself that today will be the day that I accomplish at least half of my list.  However, by the time I drag my extremely tired and emotionally drained body home from the office, pick up Addison and head home.  I have lost all ambition.  My priorites become - jammies, couch, helping with homework, cooking dinner (on a good night), and working on auction letters.  SIDE NOTE:  Thank God that I am able to get off work at 3pm.

This has been going on for several weeks now and I am completely worn out.  I am now to the point of being tired of being tired!  I hope to not even leave the house tomorrow.  I want to straighten up a bit, put out my small amount Christmas decorations and just relax and work on some of my Christmas gifts.  (tune in later for the next blog - Advent Conspiracy).

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Use Your INSIDE Voice

One thing that I left out of my post yesterday (I know, you're wondering HOW could she have left anything out? -- it was a book) ... well I did, so now you have to hear it (well, read it).

I'm trying to chill out at Starbucks yesterday morning patiently waiting for my locksmith.  I'm looking through the paper (for ideas on who to attack, I mean, politely ask for silent auction items).  So, I'm noting my ideas and chugging my mocha ... when this shrill shriek comes from the corner.  What could it be?  We are not in the wilderness, so it can't be a hyena.  I turn to sneek a peak ... and found the source.  These two women were taking up the comfy chairs in the back.  Woman B, was the shrieker.  Everytime she spoke or laughed it was like nails down a chalkboard.  It was just horrendous.  She was so loud and obnoxious.  So, of course, I start plotting her immediate death in my head - and yes, it would start with the vocal chords.

Well, then Woman A got a word in, finally.  I almost fell off of my seat when she told Shrieker Chic - that her husband really liked them being friends.  That she (Woman A) had this other friend that really got on his nerves, but he could actually spend time around Woman B.  WHAT?!  Who could this other friend be?  Leonna Helmsly is dead and Kimora Lee Simmons doesn't live in the area.  Then it gets worse, Woman A states that the one thing her husband really enjoys about Woman B - is her, LAUGH.  WHAT?  I mean, I have spent 10 minutes listening to her and I think my ears are about to bleed.  The guy has to either be losing his hearing or is already deaf (or will soon be if he hangs around the shrieker much longer).  Surely she cannot be married.  Otherwise, she would not be out and about - as her husband would have her tied up at home with a roll of duct tape around her mouth.

So, you are probably thinking that I was ease dropping.  Oh no!  I could have put in the earplugs that plane mechanics wear and STILL could have heard their entire conversation.

Lesson:  when you are inside a public place (i.e. Starbucks); use your inside voice because no one else wants to hear your inane conversation or your shrieks and snorts everytime your companion says anything.  If you can't stay within these social boundaries - then stay the hell out of MY Starbucks!

A Group of Fine Women

I had quite the day yesterday (if you read my other blog - you know the story).  I was just feeling beat down by the time I got home and even more so by the time I dragged my body to bed after doing more computer work.

Well, up this morning.  Got to lay in bed and chat with my husband for about 10 minutes (this is always a treat for me).  Then I scored a free Starbucks Mocha (yay).  I then headed over to The Hope Center for a committee meeting.  Wow, what a dose of the Lord can do for your spirit and overall attitude!

By the time I left the meeting, I was actually on a total high.  I felt so good.  Almost invicible.  I totally believe that God places people exactly where they should be, at the time they should be there and with the people they should be with.  The group of women in this committee are just awesome.  So many times when people think of Christians (esp women) that are putting on an event -- they think they are "holier than though" "pious" or "judgemental and snooty."  If that is your feelings, I encourage you to step out and interact with a group of "church girls."

These women are just nice, normal women.  Women that make you think, wow - I'd like to be friends with her.  They are not perfect and they don't pretend to be.  They are just a group of women who have chosen to give of themselves and their time to focus on others.  To make spreading the WORD of GOD a priority.  It's just plain ... cool and I love it.

The prayer time this morning was wonderful and inspiring.  I do not have the spiritual gift of praying aloud; but thank God the other women do!

The one quandry ... the more time I spend serving and working with charities, the more pulled I feel in that direction ... yet, work must proceed (for now).

A Group of Fine Women

I had quite the day yesterday (if you read my other blog - you know the story).  I was just feeling beat down by the time I got home and even more so by the time I dragged my body to bed after doing more computer work.

Well, up this morning.  Got to lay in bed and chat with my husband for about 10 minutes (this is always a treat for me).  Then I scored a free Starbucks Mocha (yay).  I then headed over to The Hope Center for a committee meeting.  Wow, what a dose of the Lord can do for your spirit and overall attitude!

By the time I left the meeting, I was actually on a total high.  I felt so good.  Almost invicible.  I totally believe that God places people exactly where they should be, at the time they should be there and with the people they should be with.  The group of women in this committee are just awesome.  So many times when people think of Christians (esp women) that are putting on an event -- they think they are "holier than though" "pious" or "judgemental and snooty."  If that is your feelings, I encourage you to step out and interact with a group of "church girls."

These women are just nice, normal women.  Women that make you think, wow - I'd like to be friends with her.  They are not perfect and they don't pretend to be.  They are just a group of women who have chosen to give of themselves and their time to focus on others.  To make spreading the WORD of GOD a priority.  It's just plain ... cool and I love it.

The prayer time this morning was wonderful and inspiring.  I do not have the spiritual gift of praying aloud; but thank God the other women do!

The one quandry ... the more time I spend serving and working with charities, the more pulled I feel in that direction ... yet, work must proceed (for now).

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Oh What a Day ...

Do you ever have one of those days where you are just so ... AGH ... and tired that you just want to cry?  Welcome to my Wednesday.

I was up until about 1am this morning working on my donation request letters.  Then I was still wired so I decided to watch some telly - finally woke up on the couch around 3am and stumbled to bed.  Then the evil alarm buzzed at me at 7am.  UGH.  Made lunches, got ready, dropped Addison at school and headed to LakeSide.  The best part of my day ... my grande non-fat mocha latte no whip extra hot.  Yum.  Met with the locksmith - then off to the office.

During this time I discover that my #*!?*# phone is still "stuck" ... the middle button will not work.  This button is somewhat important since it controls my entire phone.  At this point I cannot access my text messages, email, calendar, most of my contacts and to make matters worse -- Facebook!  Oh, the agony.  While driving into the office on the Tollroad I seriously considered just throwing it out the window.  Humm, would that be considered littering?  My newest idea is to just take it over to Lori's house so she can run over it with her husband's truck (that seemed to work for her iPhone ealier this week).

At the office ... thank goodness Nancy is already preparing for our 11am meeting as I'm on the phone from the time I get there until I head into the meeting.

Back to my desk.  One thing after another, all while trying to work on my budget (which I promised a draft of to my boss by Friday ... humm).  More stuff, more stuff and more stuff.  I left so much stuff in my "out-box" when I ran out of the office that Nancy probably spent the remainder of the afternoon making a voodoo doll of me out of office supplies.

Off I drive to Eunice's to get my nails done.  While in the car, constant worry about work, all of my unfinished projects at home (that's a whole other blog), Addison's science fair project, laundry, dinner, Thanksgiving, donation request letters ... slight panic attack.  Consider foregoing my nail appointment and stopping in at the nearest bar.  Come to my senses - continue on to Eunice's.

I do have a few nice hours at Eunice's getting my nails done and hearing about Kimi's drama (believe me, funny).  Slight stress when I keep getting text messages and emails that I can't access.  Again, I think of ways that I can destroy said evil phone ... would acetone work?

Back to LakeSide to lock up a space.  Pick up Addison from the rec and head to Costco, as now my gas light is on (along with my check engine soon light).  This is the point that I seriously want to just pull over and cry.  I feel tired throughout my entire body.

Yes, there is a line at the gas pumps, of course.  I get behind this infinity - he pulls up to the second pump.  BEFORE he even opens his door, the car in front of him drives away.  I make what I believe to be a nice friendly gesture for him to move on up to the first pump.  Did he?  Well, of course not.  He gets out of his car to start pumping gas.  So I have to drive around him and then back up to the first pump.  Yes, I did consider backing up "just a little too much" and ramming the front end of his car.  But, then I think how the police would be called out and that would just take up too much of my already dwindling evening.  So, instead, I give him a not so nice "what a dumbass" look.  I say a few choice words (in the car - he didn't hear - something about a camel).  Poor Addison, she is just listening to my rant.

Into Costco we go.  Of course they are out of the PJs that I needed to exchange (Donna's b-day gift).  I have to get the crap for work for our potluck Friday lunch.  Yes, you can tell I'm in the holiday spirit, isn't it oozing?  And since I'm still in my heels, now my feet hurt (along with the rest of my body).

Drive home.  Double check, yep, dishes are still piled in the sink.  Addison is wanting baby quiches and spring rolls heated up (don't ask).  Of course, it was too much to ask that she read the directions and turn on the oven.  I get to the safety of my closet where my dear, sweet, comfy jammies await me.  Heaven at last.  Finally, I have time to go to the bathroom (yes probably TMI, but get over it).  As I was sitting "there" I was thinking, wow, this is so nice.  I'm alone.  It's peaceful.  It's quiet.  Is that why men spend so much time in the potty?

Okay - back to reality.  Pre-heat oven.  Heat up Addison's "dinner" ... pls don't call CPS!  I usually feed her better.  Mitchell forages in the fridge for leftovers and I get a whole 10-15 minutes to just sit on the couch.  Ooh.  Aww.  My serenity is broken by the outcry for math homework help.  Of course I have to look stuff up on google (since I can barely remember yesterday, I dang sure can't remember fraction formulas).  Susan is at church, so I can't compare answers with her ... so I forge ahead and finish the worksheet.  Whew.

Addison's science fair project is due Friday.  We did the experiment part last night.  Tonight was set to be power point night ... which I was dreading more than a shopping trip for jeans.  However, now she says "we" now only have to do a data table and graph.  But of course, she's not sure what information to use.  I send her away and keep the science fair info ... yes, I will be reading about that later tonight.  Joy.  Everyone reading this can be my witness - I will NEVER make Addison take Honors Science again.  I loathe science fair with every single bone in my body.  It is horrific torture.  This should be punishment for the terrorists we have locked up in their "day spas" ... everyday they would have to do a science fair project.  They would soon talk - spill the beans on where Bin Laden is, weapons of mass destruction, etc.

See the government just needs a good group of kick ass moms running the country.  We know how to set limits, we can say no, we can work within a budget, and face it - we are just smarter.

Well, I have to close now so that I can see what "we" need to work on for what I hope is the very last science fair project that ever has to be done within the walls of this house.  That's the main reason I couldn't imagine having more children ... that's just more science fair projects.  Humm, that could be used as a slogan for birth control!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Contentment

I was just reading Charles Swindoll's Insight for Today, about Contentment (insight for today).

This really spoke to me. I am often "afraid" of being content ... I feel that I don't have the right to be, or that something is going to happen (like I'm always bracing for the next "thing").

This thought hit me hard during this past summer, and of course, like always, God brought it to my attention.  It was one of many things that I took away from the Beth Moore Esther Study that I did this summer.  That the enemy doesn't want you to be content. He wants you to worry about the past, worry about the present and worry about the future.  To be truthful, I was caught up in that circle for a long time!  Constant worry.  Constant uneasiness, like I was on the edge at all times.

However, lately I have been making a decisive effort to just BE.  Just BE okay. Not perfect. Not to worry about every minute detail (not only those in my life, but those in other's lives too).  I would have a tendency (and still do at times, b'cs I'm not perfect) to dwell on other people's issues.  If someone told me they were having a problem, I wanted to find a solution for them (even if they didn't want a solution).  Can anyone relate to that?

For those that know me well, you're thinking yea right, Chasity is easing up? ... YES it is true. I am just content with my life. I have come to love Jesus, I love my husband, I love my kids, I love my friends.  I don't completely flip out if the house is not perfectly clean, if my bed is not made and if there are a few (okay 4) baskets of laundry that needs to be folded at any given time.  If someone helps me fold the towels, I no longer go behind them and re-fold them the correct way (my way).  It's just not that important any more.  Yes, I still have some OCD tendencies (toilet paper, going over the roll, not under - and yes, I still on occasion change it at other people's houses).

But these days.  I feel myself being pulled (led?) toward service.  I would much rather serve in aspects of ministries that I truly believe in - than lead a perfect life and just serve myself.

As I was searching for a verse on worry  ... this popped up.  WOW!

Matthew 6:25 (New International Version)

Do Not Worry
25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?


Does God know me or what?  He just called me out!  Yes, this is one part of my life that I do still worry about (diet, weight, etc) - to the point of obsession at times.  I can honestly say that I have not surrendered this part of my life to God.  I do hope to one day, sooner than later.

Contentment

I was just reading Charles Swindoll's Insight for Today, about Contentment (insight for today).

This really spoke to me. I am often "afraid" of being content ... I feel that I don't have the right to be, or that something is going to happen (like I'm always bracing for the next "thing").

This thought hit me hard during this past summer, and of course, like always, God brought it to my attention.  It was one of many things that I took away from the Beth Moore Esther Study that I did this summer.  That the enemy doesn't want you to be content. He wants you to worry about the past, worry about the present and worry about the future.  To be truthful, I was caught up in that circle for a long time!  Constant worry.  Constant uneasiness, like I was on the edge at all times.

However, lately I have been making a decisive effort to just BE.  Just BE okay. Not perfect. Not to worry about every minute detail (not only those in my life, but those in other's lives too).  I would have a tendency (and still do at times, b'cs I'm not perfect) to dwell on other people's issues.  If someone told me they were having a problem, I wanted to find a solution for them (even if they didn't want a solution).  Can anyone relate to that?

For those that know me well, you're thinking yea right, Chasity is easing up? ... YES it is true. I am just content with my life. I have come to love Jesus, I love my husband, I love my kids, I love my friends.  I don't completely flip out if the house is not perfectly clean, if my bed is not made and if there are a few (okay 4) baskets of laundry that needs to be folded at any given time.  If someone helps me fold the towels, I no longer go behind them and re-fold them the correct way (my way).  It's just not that important any more.  Yes, I still have some OCD tendencies (toilet paper, going over the roll, not under - and yes, I still on occasion change it at other people's houses).

But these days.  I feel myself being pulled (led?) toward service.  I would much rather serve in aspects of ministries that I truly believe in - than lead a perfect life and just serve myself.

As I was searching for a verse on worry  ... this popped up.  WOW!

Matthew 6:25 (New International Version)

Do Not Worry
25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?


Does God know me or what?  He just called me out!  Yes, this is one part of my life that I do still worry about (diet, weight, etc) - to the point of obsession at times.  I can honestly say that I have not surrendered this part of my life to God.  I do hope to one day, sooner than later.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

IKEA Rant - a little conviction goes a long way

This was posted on my other blog - but I felt it "belonged" on this one too:


So, I am sitting in church this morning listening to Pete's sermon. He is talking about getting angry (different reasons, etc). He brought up the gay marriage issue. He said that it makes him angry that the gay community states they are tired of the hatred shown against them. Pete put in so well - I will not do it justice here -- go online and listen to the pod cast (http://www.btbf.org/) ... but the gist was just because we, as Christians, do not believe in gay marriage since we believe that God ordained marriage between one woman and one man, does not mean that we feel hatred against those that are living in the gay lifestyle.

I felt very convicted when he said this as I was pretty hateful in my IKEA post last night against the gay crowd at IKEA. I do stand by my beliefs that God does not condone the gay lifestyle choice (yes, I did say choice); however, I do not intend to be hateful toward those that are caught up in that sin trap. I do not wish for anyone to be caught up in daily sin and miss the joy of what life could really be like.

IKEA Rant - a little conviction goes a long way

This was posted on my other blog - but I felt it "belonged" on this one too:


So, I am sitting in church this morning listening to Pete's sermon. He is talking about getting angry (different reasons, etc). He brought up the gay marriage issue. He said that it makes him angry that the gay community states they are tired of the hatred shown against them. Pete put in so well - I will not do it justice here -- go online and listen to the pod cast (http://www.btbf.org/) ... but the gist was just because we, as Christians, do not believe in gay marriage since we believe that God ordained marriage between one woman and one man, does not mean that we feel hatred against those that are living in the gay lifestyle.

I felt very convicted when he said this as I was pretty hateful in my IKEA post last night against the gay crowd at IKEA. I do stand by my beliefs that God does not condone the gay lifestyle choice (yes, I did say choice); however, I do not intend to be hateful toward those that are caught up in that sin trap. I do not wish for anyone to be caught up in daily sin and miss the joy of what life could really be like.

IKEA Rant - a little conviction goes a long way

So, I am sitting in church this morning listening to Pete's sermon.  He is talking about getting angry (different reasons, etc).  He brought up the gay marriage issue.  He said that it makes him angry that the gay community states they are tired of the hatred shown against them.  Pete put in so well - I will not do it justice here -- go online and listen to the pod cast (http://www.btbf.org/) ... but the gist was just because we, as Christians, do not believe in gay marriage since we believe that God ordained marriage between one woman and one man, does not mean that we feel hatred against those that are living in the gay lifestyle.

I felt very convicted when he said this as I was pretty hateful in my IKEA post last night against the gay crowd at IKEA.  I do stand by my beliefs that God does not condone the gay lifestyle choice (yes, I did say choice); however, I do not intend to be hateful toward those that are caught up in that sin trap.  I do not wish for anyone to be caught up in daily sin and miss the joy of what life could really be like.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

IKEA Revisited (yes, a lot like Brideshead)

Yes, I know that I had sworn to NEVER return to IKEA again; however, I had to return quite a few items, as sometimes design ideas look so much better in my head than in reality.  So hear we go.  Mitchell drops me off and waits in the car.  I make the trek into the store from hell.  I was totally expecting to have to rescan my items, process my own return, and even restock the items.  But, to my surprise there are 2 real, actual people working in the Return Dept.  Yay I think and I get a little hope.  Then the boy behind the counter asks me if I took a number.  WHAT?  Yes, they had one of those machines where you have to pull a number and then wait to be called.  Ta-da, here is the machine:





  So I'm heading over to the number machine and as I'm reaching to pull a number, this ass (we'll call him shaggy) of a "man" (and I use that word very loosely) grabs a number first!  I of course give him "the look" and say "really?" ... he ignores me and returns to his partner.





So I take a seat, with my number, on an uncomfortable, stupid, IKEA bench.  Things do seem to be moving along in the return lines and then - of course - one of the workers collects her items and leaves the desk.  So, I continue to sit and to wait - while staring down the 2 inconsiderate gay guys who stole my number.

I have a flashback of the Beetlejuice movie, where Beetlejuice is in the waiting room to talk to one of the afterworld people and he steals the head hunter's numbers so he can be seen sooner.  Of course, then he gets his head shrunk.  So, I decide not to go take my rightful number back.

Guy 175 goes up the to the counter - he's dressed in black pants and a black shiny shirt - yes, nice.  He doesn't have a receipt so the IKEA boy takes a good 5 minutes explaining to him the return policy, finally he gets hauled off to somewhere else.  Then the "guys" get called up (with what should have been my number 176).  Shaggy realizes once he gets to the counter, he has brought in the wrong box!  Poetic justice!  I loved it.  I actually laughed, yes out loud.  He and lover boy storm out.  Here I go, 177, my return goes smoothly to my shocking disbelief.  Got my $90 credit and still have re-vowed NEVER to return to that horrid store again.

I will give you a hint however, if you are a foreigner or a gay guy (hell, maybe even a gay foreigner) IKEA is the new scene on Saturday night.




Partner's Card Shopping 101

Well, Jenn and I met up at LakeSide yesterday to do our annual Partner's Card Shopping.  We started off at one of our favorite stores, Sur La Table.  This store is so ooh and ahh.  The funny part, Jenn bought more stuff there than I did (humm, for those that know Jenn - you are snickering right now).  My purchase here was relatively small ($30-ish) - no biggie so far.

Off to Starbucks for a cold one (yumm, Passion Fruit Non Classic Tea--see I am addicted to Starbuck-ese).  Then we head to Renee Rouleau.  Here's where my shopping really starts.  I love, love, love her products and 20% off is a huge savings there.  So I basically bought 2 of everything that I use.  Believe me, this purchase was much larger than my previous one at Sur La Table.  Jenn did much better on her spending here than I did.  Mine was in the triple digits, that's all I'm saying.  But, to my defense, these are products that I will use everyday and they will last a long time -- and I saved a lot!  So, for this purchase, I use the credit card that emails the statements directly to me (not mailed directly to Mitchell's office).  :) 

Then off we go to Corner Wines - another one of our favorite shops.  Not much damage done there - we each bought 3 bottles of vino, again $30-ish bucks.  Not bad, huh?

Jenn had to head out and pick up the kiddos.  So off I go to The Woolie ewe all by my lonesome.  I LOVE this store.  Their yarn is so awesome and the nicest people work there.  It's one of those places, where you walk in and they know your name (kind of like a yarn store version of Cheers).  Again, another triple digit purchase ... but, wow, 20% off.  I have to admit, I am a bit of a Yarn Hoarder (I may seek help after the holidays).

So now I arrive home.  No one is at home, except the dogs (and they are so loyal -- they would NEVER rat me out).  So, the Sur La Table bag goes into the extra bedroom until I have a chance to stash my newly acquired popcorn maker and gourmet popcorn into the closet.  The Renee Rouleau bag gets to just sit on the dryer by the laundry baskets ... yes, it's amazing how small the bag is, yet how expensive the purchase.  The wine goes straight into the additional "6 pack holder" that I keep by the frig.  The yarn, off to the yarn/craft/ebay closet.

The hubby comes home.  No evidence.  Of course, he walks in while I'm on Farmville, so I quickly get out of that and get back into my silent auction letters that I'm working on.

Humm, he's home now, and of course, I am on the computer AGAIN (in bed, in jammies) ... gotta go!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Blogger Block ...

I have been updating my "fun" blog almost daily ... but I have only one post on this blog.  This fact has really been weighing on my mind.  I have been stressing over this.  Feeling really guilty.  I had all of these good (well, what I thought were good) ideas at the beginning and they seemed to have just vanished.

The more I thought about this - the more I believed this was blogger block alright, but by a different source.  It's my belief that the closer you are getting to God, the more you are talking to Him, listening to Him, glorifying Him ... the more the enemy wants to attack.  These attacks can be so sneaky ... little things-distractions, self doubt, tiredness, "ADD" of sorts.  I have been getting more and more invloved in charity events, ministries, functions, etc.  And I really love it.  So when the enemy saw this --- that's when the doubt came in to play ... can you pull all of this off?  are you over-committed?  aren't you going to be tired and stressed trying to get all of the stuff done?

Well, I am not going to let any of those "doubts" control my life now or ever.  I am fully re-committing myself to my current undertakings:  * Zone Leader @ Church (BTBF) * Helping Susan with the E Plano Food Bank (she does 99% of the work and all of the planning) * Partnering with The Family Place by promoting The Partner's Card Event as much as possible, and * Chairing the Silent Auction Committee (and continually praying for committee members -- HINT HINT) for the Tender Hearts Luncheon, benefitting Need Him Ministries.

I would ask that if you are reading this, please take a moment to say a prayer of encouragement for me to have joy while serving!

Blogger Block ...

I have been updating my "fun" blog almost daily ... but I have only one post on this blog.  This fact has really been weighing on my mind.  I have been stressing over this.  Feeling really guilty.  I had all of these good (well, what I thought were good) ideas at the beginning and they seemed to have just vanished.

The more I thought about this - the more I believed this was blogger block alright, but by a different source.  It's my belief that the closer you are getting to God, the more you are talking to Him, listening to Him, glorifying Him ... the more the enemy wants to attack.  These attacks can be so sneaky ... little things-distractions, self doubt, tiredness, "ADD" of sorts.  I have been getting more and more invloved in charity events, ministries, functions, etc.  And I really love it.  So when the enemy saw this --- that's when the doubt came in to play ... can you pull all of this off?  are you over-committed?  aren't you going to be tired and stressed trying to get all of the stuff done?

Well, I am not going to let any of those "doubts" control my life now or ever.  I am fully re-committing myself to my current undertakings:  * Zone Leader @ Church (BTBF) * Helping Susan with the E Plano Food Bank (she does 99% of the work and all of the planning) * Partnering with The Family Place by promoting The Partner's Card Event as much as possible, and * Chairing the Silent Auction Committee (and continually praying for committee members -- HINT HINT) for the Tender Hearts Luncheon, benefitting Need Him Ministries.

I would ask that if you are reading this, please take a moment to say a prayer of encouragement for me to have joy while serving!

Blockbuster (a.k.a. HELL?)

Ok.  By now everyone has probably heard about or read about the Blockbuster employee that stabbed himself in the leg to get out of working the late shift.

We've all had days where we've just not felt like going into work.  We're stressed.  We're tired.  We just want a break; however, I have never even thought about stabbing myself to get out of work!  That is just a tad extreme.  If I want a day off from work I want to hang out on the couch in my jammies, go to the movies, read, knit, play on Facebook ... not hang out in the hospital after stabbing myself.

How bad can it be working at Blockbuster?  Really, is this a such a high stress job?  Humm, "is this a new release or a regular movie?"  "does c come before d?"  "do you want the overpriced popcorn or overpriced coke?"

I just don't see this as the worse job in the world.  Boring, okay, I'll give you that.  But, it is a job.  Something tells me that this "former" employee will have a hard time getting another job ... after he heals and faces charges for filing a false police report.  No new releases for you!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Tuesdays with Jennifer (not Morrie)

Tuesdays and Thursdays are my favorite days at the office as those are the days Jennifer comes into the office.  She always brigthens my day.

This past Tuesday, I had a major case of ADD.  I was trying to work on my 2010 Budget and kept getting distracted.  I had the attention span of a ... well, of a teenager.  So, during one of my "breaks" Jenn and I were chatting.  I was telling her about my Monday evening (post vicodin).  That I spent 3 1/2 hours glazing and sponging Addison's bathroom, did a load of laundry and then the dishes.  I finally got to sit down on the couch after all of this and of course I decided to check out what was going on in the land of FB.  Well, about that time, the hubby gets home from BSF.  His comment, "well, you're complaining about your vision being blurry - maybe if you weren't always on the computer ..."  WHAT?  He couldn't have walked in when I was wrist deep in glaze? separating the laundry? emptying the dishwasher?  Oh no!

Well, Jenn said that Tom (by the way, we have decided that Tom and Mitchell are long lost brothers - they are scary alike) has been making comments about her being on the computer so much lately too.  So, when she hears him coming in - she hits the "sleep" button on the computer and steps away.

By this time, I am in tears laughing so hard.  So, I had to confess my little secret.  Yes, I do like to sit on the couch when I get home around 4pm, watch Gilmore Girl re-runs and check out Facebook, Twitter, Ebay ... you know the basics.  But, about the time that I think Mitchell is about to come home -- I start a load of laundry, start making dinner, set the table, etc ... then it appears that I have been working so hard around the house the whole afternoon.  Hey, a wife has to do what a wife has to do.  He gets to live out his June Cleaver fantasy; dinner is almost always on the table when he walks in the door; and I get a little break.  It's a win / win.  Now, this is not always the case - there are afternoons filled with doctor's appts, errands, homework help, etc.

Don't judge us ... you know you have done the same thing (or at least something along these lines).  And, we wives do work hard - and deserve the occasional facebook break.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

The Hips Cometh ...

Okay.  So I have been having major back pain (diagnosed as "degenerative disc disease" - sounds fun huh?).  My doctor recommended that I go see a physical therapist so that he could show me some exercises to do at home to help my back, and of course to take Advil for the pain (BTW, my doctor said that 12 Advil per day --- is a bit much, in case you were wondering).

So I go over to the PT's office.  Chit chat with the therapist and of course he tells me that I need to come in and see him at least twice a week - I need more than "at home exercises."  Isn't this shocking?  All we did the first visit was chat about my pain, he watched me walk, he made sure my legs were even in length (they were thank you very much), yadda, yadda, yadda.  Then the PT told me that if my back started hurting while doing an activity, stop.  Wait 15 minutes, if the pain subsides, continue the activity.  If the pain is still there - just stop.  Humm - yes, I imagine you can guess this bit of handy advice came from a man, whose activity more than likely consists of changing positions on the couch and reaching for the remote.  No, I am not jaded.

I've been back in twice and both times were somewhat useless. Stretch out on the table (yep, legs still even in length - whew, I didn't shrink!), 10 mins on the bike, stretches and then the best part ... a huge ice pack on my back while I'm hooked up to this machine with electrodes.  The best feeling ever!  If I could just take that machine with me .... ooh ahh.

With all this being said.  Friday, felt ok.  Nice lunch with my hubby, talked him into taking the rest of thd day off and doing errands with me.  I think he realized just how hard I work at shopping and errands.  It's about time I get credit for all of my hard work. 

Saturday, woke up in extreme pain!  I still managed to prep and paint most of Addison's bathroom, work on her new "play/apartment" area and cook dinner (this with the help of 3 vicodin of course).  Sunday, more pain - yet I worked at church, ran errands and finished painting the bathroom (again with the help of a couple of vicodin).  Monday rolls around - yes, still in pain the entire day.  Go to PT.  Of course, this time I'm put on the bike directly in front of the mirror (thank you Mr. Man Therapist).  So, I sit there and pedal and look at myself in the mirror for ten minutes.  Doesn't this sound like every woman's dream come true?

As I'm sitting there pedaling, I noticed these large masses on each side of my body -- I realize, humm, these are my hips.  When did they expand to that size?  Again, I think that I must have fun house / skinny mirrors at my house.  I swear that when I got dressed that morning, I looked pretty good.  What the hell happened during the day?  It was like Paula Deen herself came and slathered about 14 pounds of butter on each hip.  Damn you Paula!!!  So, finally my mirror torture time comes to an end and I get my reward of ice and electrodes.

By the time I left there and picked up Addison, I felt like I was about to vomit ... not sure if it was from the pain or the image I still had in my mind from the mirror.  I had promised Addison a "mommy / daughter" dinner out.  I had to go through with it, so off we go to Chili's.  You would think, that since I am having some body image issues that I would order water and a salad with no dressing.  Well, that so didn't happen.  They have their $20 special back -- appetizer, 2 entrees and a dessert.  Well, yes, I did partake in the cheese fries.  Yes, I did order a burger and yet more fries (to my credit, I only ate half the burger).  Yes, I did have my share of the molten chocolate cake with ice cream.  I had popped a vicodin when I got to the restaurants, so by the time we reached the house -- no pain at all.  3 1/2 hours later, bathroom was glazed and sponged and a load of laundry was done ... without another thought of the hips.

Thank God I go back to the doctor tomorrow as I can not live on vicodin alone!  Well, I could, but that probably wouldn't be the best of plans.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

A New Low (Well, Maybe it Should Be a New High)

Another crazy day.  While dropping off Addison at school I remembered that I forgot my bag at home - which I needed today for work and a meeting.  So, back home I go.  My awesome hubby was doing the dishes!  Sweet, brave man as I had let them pile up for about 2 days. 

Off to work I go.  Slammed a Coke Zero on the way in.  Busy, busy morning.  Downed a giant cup of coffee and ate a baby reeses - yes, the breakfast of champions.  Off I go to my Tender Hearts committee meeting (ate a really good cookie there) - where we do quite a bit of walking around the June Hunt Hope Center (which is a truly awesome facility, ck it out --  http://thehopecenterfoundation.org/).  But in high heeled, pointy boots ... ouch.  I rush from there to LakeSide to meet with a tenant, her architect and a contractor.  I'm on a pretty good caffiene and sugar high by this time.  But, I had a few minutes to spare, so of course - a made a quick stop at STARBUCKS!

My meeting starts and I am flying high.  I swear Starbucks is like liquid meth for me.  Humm, is meth liquid? I'm chatting with the architect and the contractor when the tenant walks in.  She says, "Wow Chasity, I didn't know you were expecting!"  I was mortified!  Already not feeling really great about my self image lately ... and this (excuse the pun) was the icing on the cake.  I politely told her that I was not pregnant and that I would never eat again.  Thank you very much.  We finish the meeting and I high tail it out of there to go to Eunice's (nail time - yay).  By the way, I was standing (still in my high heeled pointy toed boots) for entire meeting .

In the car, I decided I had two choices, 1-really never eat again OR 2-go home and polish off the remainder of Addison's chocolate birthday cake. 

I get to Eunice's right "on time" -- 3pm.  I notice that she's looking at me a bit weird.  She tells me that I'm really early - my appt is not until 4pm.  Of course.  The correct time is on my phone calendar ... but my mind seemed to be on a different schedule.  So, I decide to waste some time by walking around Hobby Lobby next door to the salon.  So I walk around Hobby Lobby (yes, still in the same evil boots) for 45 mins and $50.

Go back over and get my nails done.  So happy that my texting and emailing thumb nail has been restored!  I mean really -- I have to use my right thumb to text, since I drive with my left hand!  Duh. 

On the way to get Addison from the rec, I actually feel faint.  I am so tired that I can barely drive, all the way trying to think of what I could feed the family for dinner (just them, as you recall, I vowed to never eat again).  I stumbled into the house, managed to pry off the boots from hell, and got directly into my PJs.  Why is it that PJs just make everything better?  I swear if the dishes had still been stacked in the sink I would have cried.

By default, I decided to make cheesy, spicy corn bread and beans.  The family wasn't overjoyed, yet they ate it with little complaining.  Me, I stuck with yet another diet coke.  (see vow above)

Now I am sitting on the couch, Gracie is snuggled beside me and life is feeling a little better.  Now I must stop procrastinating and get on with doing my research and preparing for my committee meeting tomorrow morning.

tata for now .... from NOT a mommy to be

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Switching Radio Stations

(remember-this is from a few wks ago - from a note that I jotted down on my phone)
===================================================
As I stated in my blog "profile" - I listen to 94.9 KLTY on the way into the office each morning to listen to praise music and get ready for the day.  My alone time with God in the mornings.

I can just be jamming along to the music and then a commercial comes on and if I don't feel like listening to it - I just push another pre-set button and change stations.

This made me think, so often people treat churches, religions, morals, spouses and beliefs like radio stations.  They disagree with something the church pastor says ... they just pick up and move on to the next church.  They don't like the way that their lifestyle isn't matching up with their religion (the Bible) ... they just move on to the next "religion" where everything goes as they interpret the Bible in many ways, whichever fits the situation they are in.  As Oprah states, there's just not one way to get to what people call Heavan - there are many different ways (oh boy Oprah, won't you have the shock of your life when the end times come?).  She is so influential it's scary.  "check out the Church of Oprah"

Morals?  What are those these days?  Everything goes.  As long as you are happy - that's all that matters.  Worship a cow, a tree, 14 gods.  No matter.  Same thing with spouses, don't like this one, that's okay - divorces are so common, no one even thinks twice about them these days.  Divorce one and move on to the next, the one that you think will be better than the last.  The one that will fulfill your every need.  Yikes, you will set yourself up for disappointment every time.  When Mitchell and I were just dating I admit it, I was head over heels for him, adored him, idolized him.  I can remember him sitting me down and saying that Jesus should be the first and most important man in my life - not him.  He was right.

This world has become a throw-away world.  People don't hold on to their beliefs.  They think that the "grass is always greener on the other side."  Wow.  My heart just breaks for these people.  I want to stand up and shout - STOP.  WAIT.  LISTEN.  LEARN.  BELIEVE - before it is too late!  There is only one way to Heaven.  There is only one way to experience Joy ... Jesus.

John 14:6 (New International Version)



Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

Switching Radio Stations

(remember-this is from a few wks ago - from a note that I jotted down on my phone)
===================================================
As I stated in my blog "profile" - I listen to 94.9 KLTY on the way into the office each morning to listen to praise music and get ready for the day.  My alone time with God in the mornings.

I can just be jamming along to the music and then a commercial comes on and if I don't feel like listening to it - I just push another pre-set button and change stations.

This made me think, so often people treat churches, religions, morals, spouses and beliefs like radio stations.  They disagree with something the church pastor says ... they just pick up and move on to the next church.  They don't like the way that their lifestyle isn't matching up with their religion (the Bible) ... they just move on to the next "religion" where everything goes as they interpret the Bible in many ways, whichever fits the situation they are in.  As Oprah states, there's just not one way to get to what people call Heavan - there are many different ways (oh boy Oprah, won't you have the shock of your life when the end times come?).  She is so influential it's scary.  "check out the Church of Oprah"

Morals?  What are those these days?  Everything goes.  As long as you are happy - that's all that matters.  Worship a cow, a tree, 14 gods.  No matter.  Same thing with spouses, don't like this one, that's okay - divorces are so common, no one even thinks twice about them these days.  Divorce one and move on to the next, the one that you think will be better than the last.  The one that will fulfill your every need.  Yikes, you will set yourself up for disappointment every time.  When Mitchell and I were just dating I admit it, I was head over heels for him, adored him, idolized him.  I can remember him sitting me down and saying that Jesus should be the first and most important man in my life - not him.  He was right.

This world has become a throw-away world.  People don't hold on to their beliefs.  They think that the "grass is always greener on the other side."  Wow.  My heart just breaks for these people.  I want to stand up and shout - STOP.  WAIT.  LISTEN.  LEARN.  BELIEVE - before it is too late!  There is only one way to Heaven.  There is only one way to experience Joy ... Jesus.

John 14:6 (New International Version)



Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

Way Behind on Blogging...

I have a ton of notes that I put into my phone regarding things I wanted to blog about ... one was the name of the blog ... hopefully I can decipher the rest since I have not written anything here yet.

Here goes.

Way Behind on Blogging...

I have a ton of notes that I put into my phone regarding things I wanted to blog about ... one was the name of the blog ... hopefully I can decipher the rest since I have not written anything here yet.

Here goes.

The 5 Second Rule ... and George Castanza

Today was just weird.  From the very beginning.  Maybe it was the 2 "non-fat mocha lattes, no whip, extra hot" that I had first thing this morning.  It's the price you pay for "officing" at Starbucks.  And to digress a bit ... have you ever noticed that once you start speaking Starbuck-ese you can't order coffee anywhere else?  If I go into another coffee shop I just stand there and stare at the menu, speechless, lost, a little teary!

Anyway, weird day.  Again it could be the baby reeses and almond joy that I had at the office, after my lattes.  My day ends ... off I go to pick up Addison from school.  Grab her and head home.  Run in, change clothes and take off for physical therapy.  Whew - I actually make it on time.  I did my time there and on the way out I grab a peppermint (the big ones that are soft and chewy--my favorites).  So, I'm walking to the car, juggling my keys while trying to open my candy (because of course I couldn't wait 2 seconds for it until I got into the car).  Then it happened.  The peppermint shot out of the package and out of my hand and landed on the ground.

There for just a split second I contemplated picking it up and eating it (you can't tell me this kind of thought never crossed your mind at some time).  Then the image of George on an episode of Seinfeld came into my mind.  The one where George picks an eclair out of a garbage can and starts eating it.  And in true George fashion, gets caught by the girl he is trying to impress.

I gave one last longing look at the peppermint.  Got in my car and drove away.  Self control at its best!

Monday, October 26, 2009

The Wipers; The Girls; The Nail; IKEA ... oh my

The Wipers:
So, I get into my car this morning.  It's raining so I turn my wipers on (very glad that they are working).  Cruising along to work.  Rain stops.  Wipers, not so much.  I "Swish Swish Swish" all the way to the office.  Ignored the problem this time - didn't even call the hubby or my mechanic, Jennifer.

The Girls:
I'm just sitting at my desk working away and "pop" ... humm, what was that and why do I feel a little freedom?  Then I notice, my bra strap came loose from the back "base" and was hanging out the front of my sweater waving.  I tucked it back in, held up the loose girl and headed for the potty.  I had to almost completely unrobe.  Sweater off.  Bra off.  Re-attach strap.  Sweater back on.  Whew.  Then, another pop.  The OTHER strap came loose and starting waving too.  Here I go again.  Sweater off.  Bra off.  Re-attach other strap.  Sweater back on.  Whew again.  Really --- do these things happen to anyone else?

I leave work, driving home to the sound of my comforting "Swish Swish Swish."  As I'm getting out of the car - yes, you guessed it.  Pop and wave.  Really?  Three times in one day.  Sweater off, cussed out the bra,  threw it on the floor.  Installed new girl holder.  Sweater back on.  Off to get Addison, orthodontist day.

Of course the whole time I'm thinking ... humm, it was probably those extra 30 pounds that they bra just couldn't contain!  Make that 35 since I did have a piece of Addison's birthday cake Sunday night.

Nail:
Oh, I forgot to mention that while at work, my right thumb nail broke off part way -- so of course I kept messing with it and it is now all off and my nail appt is not until Thursday.  I am quite hindered at the moment as that is my texting / emailing thumb.  The day just keeps getting better.

IKEA:
After Addison's orthodontist appt - we head to Buca de Beppo for an early dinner.  Yes, I do realize that I have been griping about my weight and that I'm heading out to eat Italian.  Bite me.  We finish up there and head to IKEA.  I had not been there in forever, but we are girly-ing up the playroom upstairs for Addison.  We had a good time shopping, filling our basket.  Life is good.  Then, we get to the checkout area.  EVERY lane is self check-out.  I LOATHE self check-out lanes.  I ask one of the milling around employees if there were any regular lanes --- um, that would be a no.  I told her that if I had known the check-out procedure then I would have never even came in to shop.  What happened to customer service?  She did offer to check my items out for me at the self check counter, b'cs basically I told her that she could do that or I would leave my full basket right there and leave.  Note - that's all she did was scan the items, she then turned and walked away.  Thanks for helping me put the items back into the basket.  She must be the Employee of the Month.  There was a lady behind me at another self checkout station saying the same thing.  WHY WHY do stores do this to us?  We have to shop for our stuff, check ourselves out, bag our own stuff and then carry it out to our cars.  Maybe they will start having us unpack their boxes and shelve items too.  Then they could just employee two people to work the store.  I just don't understand this concept.  SideNote:  At least at Market Street - everyone is super nice, friendly, knowledgeable and they INSIST on carrying your bags out for you - with a smile!!!

This is about all I can take today.  Am I taking all of this a bit too serious? Or can y'all feel my pain?  On top of my misery, while leaving IKEA, Addison turns to me and says, "that wasn't very Christian like mom."  What could I say, she was right!

Birthday Bash - The After-Math

So, as you read on the previous post - the party was great.  Of course I had to take photos to upload on FB.  I uploaded the photos Saturday morning.  Oh boy!

Well, when I got dressed Friday night ... I was thinking that I looked pretty good.  Black boots, boyfriend jeans, long sleeved black thermal shirt and my new Cabi jean jacket.  Make-up, done.  Hair, done.  All is well.

I'm not sure what happened between leaving the house and arriving at the restaurant, but something unnatural occured according to the photographs that were taken during the night.  While we were driving around, a bit lost, somehow about 30 pounds jumped into the car and on my bottom half.  It must have happened when we were stopped at a stop sign.  What else could it be?  I swear I didn't look that bad when I left the house.  Maybe I have freaky fun house mirrors in my bathroom that makes my butt look smaller.  Also, during this random act of fatness --- my hair fell totally flat, my make-up disappeared and I took on a develish look around my eyes!

This is just a warning for those of you that have to drive around downtown Dallas --- random acts of fatness can occur at any time.  Keep your doors locked at all time!  And just to be on the safe side, avoid all photo ops!

Addison's 13th B-Day Bash

Overall the party was a great success.  First, Addison is so blessed to have such an awesome core group of friends.  Becca, who Addison has known since pre-school at Primrose; Britt, who Addison has known since before their first cheer leading year together (kindergarten I think); Ashley, who Addison met at church a few years ago and is now school friends with too; and Haley, who Addison met at Huffman.  These girls had such a fun time.  They were fun.  They were nice and polite - not only to each other but to all others we encountered.

We started the night off at our house.  Chris (Britt's mom) volunteered to drive so that we could all fit into her car.  You are AWESOME Chris!!!  Well, off we go to The "New" Hard Rock Cafe.  We input the address into Chris' iPhone and start our journey.  Without boring everyone with the tedious details .. we FINALLY made it to The Hard Rock.  By the way --- bad GPS, bad GPS.  Humm.  The place was not what you would call hoppin'.  It was very modern - way too modern for the Hard Rock.  Posters of Kelly Clarkson and outfits from Brittany Spears were displayed...??? I'm sorry??? Since when do they belong at The Hard Rock???  I told the girls to go pose by the Motley Crue guitar ... they were all like, who?  Thank goodness we had a really great waitress - she made the dinner really fun.  Towards the end - most of the restaurant was up doing THRILLER.  It was great.

Off we head to the Palladium Club for the Colby Caillat concert.  The start time was 8pm ... I think Colby finally came on at 10pm!  After 2 long and boring opening acts, and then another 30 mins of just waiting.  Everyone was more than anxious to have her come out.  I didn't realize also that Colby had such a lesbian following.  There were lesbians galore ... snuggling, holding hands, etc.  Nice.  Yes, such a nice thing to expose the kids too.  After about 3 songs and way too much goofy talk from Colby - the girls were ready to call it a night.

Back to the house.  The girls were too tired for cake, but of course, Addison did manage to get her presents opened!

The next morning - you guessed it, cake for breakfast.  The breakfast of champions!!!

All in all a good party.  And a special night for my sweet girl.

Beware ---

I'm going to post about 14 million blogs right now!  Hang on!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

The Wipers on the Bus go Swish, Swish, Swish, Swish ....

Ok.  So I get in my car this morning.  Back out of the garage -- just like any other normal day.  I notice, WOW -- it's not even raining today.  Life is good.  Then I notice that my wind shield wipers are on and just swishing away.  I look down, make sure they are in the OFF position, and they just keep swishing away.  I turn the control to High ... Swish Swish Swish, I turn it to Low ... Swish Swish Swish, I turn it off again ... Swish Swish Swish.

So here I go, taking Addison to school - swishing all the way.  While in the carpool lane, I did turn on the wiper fluid thingy on, so at least it would look like I had the wipers on for a reason. 

Continuing on my way to the office, I call Mitchell (not in the best mood so he mentioned something about a fuse and what did I expect him to do about it).  Next, I call Jennifer of course, because, well, just because.  She mentions the fuse thing too.  Am I the only one not schooled in fuses?  I pull over.  Get out my flashlight (yes, I keep a flashlight and a tape measure in the glove box) and begin to search under the steering column for this mystery fuse I've heard so much about.  Nada!

I swish my way all the way to the office where I finally break down and look in the owner's manual.  Come to find out my fuse box is under the hood.  Great.  Well, my partner in crime pulls up beside me so we set out to fix the problem.  I mean really, we have given birth to real live little people - this should be a breeze.

Well, I'm not going to admit how long it took me to get the hood open ... but I finally did.  We found the fuse box.  As I begin to pry the top off the fuse box, I hear a loud crack.  At this point, I'm thinking ummm, maybe I pulled a little too hard.  Then I hear the sound of something metal falling down into the engine area.  Jenn looks at me and we decide to do what any women would do -- ignore it.

We found the correct fuse and of course we couldn't get it out, not even with my well manicured nails.  By this time we both have greasy hands and are realizing that our dream of opening up our own car repair shop is slowing going down the drain!  Thank goodness our dear bldg engineer (Pedro) strolls by.  I talk him into getting some pliers and after about 5 minutes, the fuse is FREE.  I'm so happy.  I'm do a little jig.  Well, I get back into the car, start it and here it goes again, Swish Swish Swish.  Dejected, I give up and go into the office to do my real job (and of course to disenfect my hands).

My dear hubby shows up a bit later at my office, still not in the best mood.  He's all upset -- he thought I said the wipers were on even if the engine was shut off (I never said this, just more proof that he never listens to me).  He had come over to check things out so that my battery wouldn't run down.  I figured this was NOT the time to mention me breaking the box thing and something clanking down in the engine area.

So, my work day ends.  I get into the car ... Swish Swish Swish.  At this point -- I just give up; however, by the time I exit the parking garage - the wipers just stop.  WHEW. 

Let's just hope they actually work the next time I really need them!!!

Thank you Jennifer, my dear friend and mechanic!

What a day!

It has been quite a day!! I can hardly wait for Chasity's blog entry.

I promise, it will be a good one!

Jenn

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Blogging???

I cannot believe I'm "blogging". Generally I don't think my life is very interesting although an occasional "good" story will come out of some of my life experiences. Most of those stories involve my children. They do keep life interesting.

Fat girls wear boots too was simply something I said one day in frustration. Because I CANNOT find a pair of boots I can zip up around my calves. It's no secret, I'm not as thin as I used to be. And I use the word "thin" loosely here. I've always thought of myself as "big boned". But GEEZE, I'd like to sport a nice pair of boots every now and then.

I want to be fashionable no matter my size. AND, this girl needs a pair of ROCKIN' cool boots for the Fall! The search has begun for a pair I can actually zip without cutting off the circulation to my feet.

To be continued...


Jenn